The High Road - No not off the road

Why is it so difficult for folks to take the high road? Don't most people have that moral compass to show them where the high road is? The simplistic things make me most crazy, like not letting one car merge into your lane as a courtesy, opening the door on the right when leaving a building (thus not making one wait for the enterance door to be freed for use after those leaving used it for exiting), letting the gal with three items behind you in line at the market to go in front of you, etc. You know the simple stuff. That simple stuff, if practiced by most, can make a difference, but once again I digress.

Now I know I have written about random acts of kindness, paying it forward, and making time. But this Blog idea has set me a blaze by the North Korean's threat to use it's, "maybe ready", nuclear bombs against the US. Obviously the US is taking this potentialy empty threat seriously. Why else would we start to strategically move our defenses into place? Oh what a great question!

Clearly there is no high road for either North Korea or the US to take. I understand that this threat is the ultimate threat and we need to protect our country...blah, blah, blah. Ok so knowing this young 26 year old leader of this nation is flexing his one and only muscle to show the world as well as his citizens that he isn't afraid to "literally" cause WWIII. I mean why not, that's what he was raised to portray, right? Doesn't that provide some transparency (oh how I love that word) of his real intentions?  Sure he is sociopathic and doesn't care about his legacy, after all it won't exist if the world doesn't either. But I'm betting he would rather maintain his status quo for the lifestyle he has both with the possesion of power and of wealth. In a nut shell your basic sociopath little prick!

The South Korean's aren't too worried about the latest threat because they coninuosly live under this type of attempted fear mongering. Wait, did you just notice something? SK is trying to take the higher road? They aren't willing to give the little prick any validity with another empty threat. AKA the high road. Wow what a feeling. Good for SK and their refusal to be bullied. Hey, besides if they get bombed that pretty much wipes them out. Oh crap, but wait...they expect the Super Americans to protect them!

Perhaps they aren't taking the higher road at all, rather they are sticking their head in the ground. Damn, I though for once a high profile issue would be adverted by that higher road. I really hate politics, the pricks that play politics and the fact they always seem to get what they seek. And I'm not thrilled with the USA being the go to guys all of the time!

It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and serious? Come on give me any good reason why women shouldn't rule more countries!

Spirits - Not Hocus-pocus

The great debate of soul, spirit, faith...it will never be resolved, nor should it be. Everyone on this planet has some thoughts about one or more of these words and what they mean to that individual varies so greatly. I find it absolutely facinating. A friend thinks there is more behind my fascination but that is an entirely different blog.

Just the other night we were sitting around the dinner table discussing the comparison of The Stories of Bible and The story of Frankenstein. It was a great dicsussion and I learned quite a bit about both stories. My friend was loving every moment. That type of discussion gets her going and  I really enjoyed watching her enthusiasum for it! A very faithful and yet Apologetic believer. Interesting at the least!

So starting with the last word I typed, faith, lets talk about it. (Ok, I will talk and you read!) So many people have faith or claim to! That word alone is huge and there are multiple directions to take that word for interpritation and discussion. The faith I'm discussing at this time is a person's belief that there is a God that not only created them but predetermined the believers destiny. Ok, here we go...how can someone believe in that and yet find a need to pray for guidance, clarity, support, etc. if that persons destiny has been predetermined then how does prayer factor in? I'm sincere about that question. And this is where I get stuck.

I asked our group around the table about the fact Jesus died for our sins, right? Ok, so what happened to those folks who were born and died before Christ was born and died for the believe's sins? My flippant comment was that I was glad I was born AC. I digress. (as usual)

I'm not sure, but it is safe to say that most religions have their own definition of soul, spirit and faith. In fact, that is where I get really turned upside down. Sure, everyone has their own personal and organic definition that they then MUST reconcile with their religious beliefs. (one that someone decided to assemble like minded folks and then called it religion). Do not get me started there!!!

As most of you are aware my immediate family members were raised as Catholics. My father asked permission of his mother, (out of respect), if he could convert to Catholasism. With gracious permission he was granted his request. It then was determined all of the sibling in our family would be raised as Catholics and attend Catholc school. Since I'm 12 years behind my brother and sister that idea did not position me for anything other than a regular old public education. I'm unsure of the story of why I wasn't put through the delights of a a Catholic school but I'm sure finances factored in.

So let's get on to the next word, remember we are going backward, (don't ask why, just go along), spirit! What is spirit? Is it a feeling, a belief, a presence...I find this much easier to relate to. I do believe there are types and degrees of energy that surrounds us all and surges through us all. How it manifests itself in the hosting body is a great concept and is that the spirit I speak of? Can spirit be both positive and negative? Does one who possess the positive do so by choice or chance? The same for the negative, assuming that exists, does it choose the host or visa versa. Or, let me wrench it a bit more. Does everybody have a spirit and if so, does those who possess it know they do? Is that a learned element that over time ones, "ones gets to know it?"

For me, my spirit is reflected by my actions and my words. I'm not saying I'm close to perfect but I can confidently say that I am above average when it comes to my words and actions not only matching up properly but positively as well. Here's another wrench, Karma! Of all the words I believe in Kharma is huge, in fact I believe it to be the single most life influential words I have. Now, let me clarify that my love of Kharma isn't due to the fear of retribution. The old, "what goes around comes around." My passion for that word it the idea that my positive thoughts and actions will help to benefit folks who need it most. That he driver running late to work, the gal waiting too long in line at Starbuck's, the parent becomming angry with their child unwillingness to, "do as they are told."
I'm sure I have left you with doubt, confusion and perhaps so anger. I don't follow a religeous structure, nor do I see things with those hypnotizing glasses they hand out before mass on Sunday. I
do not harbor any judgement. I never will. Until you have been judged you'll never understand the
impact it carries with it.

Last and certainly not last is the word soul. Big word, does your definition measure up? Is ones soul
similar to spirt of entirely different? I liken my soul to the freedom it is given upon my physical death to continue onward to who knows where? Reincarnation? To replace one that a living being has never received aor lost it duringbacnear death experience? Oh, so many questions to get answers to, if the 
exist that is.

Tests - not the kind in school

It amazes me that there are such stark differences between Internal Medicine Practitioners. I recently, by chance, found a different doctor at the office I always have gone to since moving here in 2006. That chance happened to be very much in my favor. It turns out that the issues and concerns I have had for some time now are actually being taken seriously. This new doctor sat and listened to me go over a list of concerns with great interest. She asked many questions to ensure she clearly understood what my symptoms have been and for how long I have had them. I left that first visit about a month ago feeling like I may actually have some solutions to the problems, "that I didn't really have" according to the other doctor.

Not only did this new doctor take me seriously, she actually ordered tests to help in her accuracy with the evaluation of my health. Now we aren't talking about a blood test or two. I have had a battery of tests and have seen a pulmonary specialist as well. He too, ran multiple tests that I hadn't had before, let alone ever heard of or known about. I still am not half way through with the tests and from the looks of things it is going to be awhile before they are satisfied with their thoroughness.

I find myself in a bit of a mental and emotional conflict. I am very pleased to be taken seriously, finally! I am also happy that I am getting the care I deserve. I am however, a bit nervous about the results of the tests. Now that I am into it knee deep I will now find out what the problem(s) are. I remain positive and hopeful that anything I will find out can and will be treated with success. Still, there is that little voice in the back of my head whispering to me. I hear that whisper mostly at the peaceful times of the day and night as I am trying to sleep. I try hard not to listen to that little voice whispering to me but I have to believe it is there for a reason. One that I won't know until all these tests are completed and the doctors make their determination(s).

So far nothing serious has been determined regarding my health. Ok, so I have Asthma, it runs in the family. No surprise for me there and I am not pleased but I am not overly concerned either. But that is the tip of the ice berg. There are several other issues yet to be discovered and revealed. As each test result comes back and the next steps are taken I am sure I will feel better regardless of the outcome. Hey, being able to breathe now is pretty cool.

It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and serious? Come on now and give me any good reason why doctors can't all behave like doctors are expected to behave!

Respectfully Yours, or Maybe Not

Not sure where this Blog will take me but I am sitting here on Christmas Eve wondering about the word respect. Certainly is it interpreted differently by those who do and those who don't demonstrate respect as it is interpreted differently by those who are or are not respected.

I would like think that the general consensus is that showing respect and treating one another with dignity is a given but, I have learned over my life time that it isn't the norm for most people. Unfortunately, the lack of respect for one another is one of societies rooted problems. The fact that most folks don't start out respecting someone in the beginning of a relationship; business, friendship or significant other. (just for the record I hate the label, "significant other").

In business, employees should demonstrate respect for the positions held by those they work with. I have had many bosses that I didn't respect personally but, I did show respect for the position they held. I may not have agreed with their behavior but they were the one I reported to and therefore I was respectful of that position. I never held back my opinion and the has done me in a few times but I didn't compromise my standards and couldn't be a "yes-woman" without at least depositing my 5 cents first. Yes, 5 cents! For those of you who know me well, you will understand why I am so generous with giving out 5 cents verses the standard 2 cents worth of opinion.

As a friend it seems to be a no brainer that you respect your friends. As I stated before not all folks interpret respect in the same manner. I do like to operate on the premiss that I respect all of my friends. Now, let me add a caveat to that. I do not respect all of my friends with equal weight. For me the weight of my respect is directly related to the degree of intensity and depth of the friendship. Obviously, those of you out there that are my friends know who you are and how much I demonstrate respect to you and to the friendship. I recommend that you all take a moment and think about who are your friends and what level of respect is present within the friendship itself. You may find that you too have various weights of respect for different friends.

The most difficult relationship to understand the reason for a lack of respect is the one between two people who are walking the road to the end together. Now, of course the emotions typically run high in a relationship that has been one of a lifetime commitment. There is much invested in the relationship in so many ways; time, energy, love, exposure, pain, joy... Why all of that doesn't always add up to respecting one another has always been a foreign concept to me. I have been in many love relationships that have resulted in hurt feelings, painful betrayal, or just complete disregard for ones security. I haven't been the one to end most of those past relationships with the exception of the last two. Regardless of the reason for the break up I have always demonstrated respect for the person I once loved enough to have that deep of a commitment to. I may have demonstrated respect by completely severing the tie once held in an effort to prevent the continued deterioration of the relationship. I may have demonstrated respect by gracefully stepping aside and remaining out of the way. I most often demonstrated respect by trying to hold onto the friendship that initially drew me toward the one I committed to. The biggest disrespectful action one can take is through the act of betrayal and for that I am guilty. I should have done the right thing because I do have a incredible amount of respect.

It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and serious. Give me one good reason why folks can't do a better job demonstrating more respect?

Your Ma'ma - lessons taught and learned

I'm sure everyone has heard the phrase,"if you don't have something nice to say then don't say anything." So, I'm interested to know how many of you follow that advise? I mean unless someone asked that you be critical of themselves it seems like keeping your trap shut if you don't have something nice to say is damn good advice! I like that advice and practice it as often as possible but ufortunately not always. Frustration or the need for validation of my feelings gets in the way. Definitely something I need to work at more. Maybe I should "make" time for that!

It is likely that mother also told you to "treat others as you would like to be treated", yes? Does everyone agree that is good advice? I certainly do, and I attempt to follow that advice as best as I possibly can. I mean after all we are created equal aren't we? or, are we? That is another blog. I digress.

Maybe your mother mentioned some other worldly advice. Did she ever say, "gracefully take what you are given and be grateful for it?" Again, another good tip to consider when choosing your behavior. Does this mean you shouldn't ask for more, or ask for something specific, or just ask for it to be given in a different way? This is one is where I get into trouble.

I can appreciate being told positive things about myself although, I do find it difficult to accept compliments. I can recognize when someone is purposly treating me kindly, respectfully, with dignity, etc. In the ways as they would like to be treated. Now when it comes to accept what you are given and be grateful for it. Now we are getting into muddy waters. That is a bit tough for me sometimes. Think about those other "golden rules" I just mentioned that your mother taugh you.

I find it very difficult to be grateful for those things I'm given when they aren't given for those reasons mother taught. If I'm not getting what I think should be given for the right reasons I tend to have my feelings hurt or I often I just flat out get pissed.

Remember, I don't like to ask for something that I'm not getting. My crazy rational is if I have to ask for it then that ruins the purpose behind the giving. Seems logical to me anyway! I mean if you are giving then there is a reason for doing so. Asking for what is missing doesn't help really. All I think is, ok you are only doing this because I asked you to. I cannot get passed that and am not sure by now my feelings will ever change.

With all that said, do you find it easy to ask for something that may be missing in a family situation, relationship, or friendship without having that nagging feeling about how genuine it will be given now that you have ask for it?

It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and serious? Give me one good reason why can't folks just try a little harder to follow Ma'ma's advice?

Go Directly to Jail - or are you an addict

We all, well most of us, have been raised that when you break the law of the land you pay the price for that action. Do the crime and then do the time. Pay your debt to society and we are good, call it even, and move on. Is it that simple? I am not so sure that it is. In fact, I am positive that it isn’t that simple.

I want to focus on one of the most common crimes committed so frequently that I really don’t think anyone could quantify it. Illicit drugs are grown, manufactured, sold, used and abused. Keep the word illicit in mind as we continue though this thought process please.

Why are illicit drugs or licit drugs illicitly used and abused such a huge problem within our American society? Let’s stay on the fact the drugs we are discussing are classified as illegal or illegally used.  I have already blogged about that subject.

Should someone who has been “busted” for possession of an illicit drug be incarcerated? Well, they broke “the law of the land” right? Yeah, they did but what about the reason why they are involved with these drugs to begin with? Is it used for recreation, is it used to mask something more serious, or is it abused because of an addiction? Shouldn’t those considerations be made before imposing a standard sentence to be jailed or imprisoned?

Recreational use is not a reason to incarcerate someone I mean really! Need I explain? Purposeful abuse to numb oneself from some form of pain is not a reason to incarcerate someone! Abuse to provide oneself a fix is not a reason to incarcerate someone! Let me break it down for you to really see what my attempt to make a point really is all about.

Does anyone have any statistics for the bodily harm inflicted of another by a recreational user? Oh, I forget we only keep track of and publicize those statistics from drunken driving accidents. I just can’t get past the hypocrisy of the whole legality of pot verses alcohol but I digress. How about that ever growing group of people who use the illicit drugs to numb their pain? Now don’t forget that their pain may be emotional or physical. Shouldn’t we look at the cause of their pain instead of just one of many symptoms for self medicated? Perhaps if society provided the proper systems and support mechanisms for addressing those who are struggling we would be able to help those individuals. They are unable to cope emotionally with their life or the complications of an illness. Now addicts are the most egregiously offended individuals. These people do not need incarceration for their illegal actions. These people need care and compassion. We as a society should be helping those addicted with their addiction.

Incarceration of any drug abuser is not solving their problem; it isn’t a deterrent to abuse, it doesn’t solve any of the core problems, it encourages continued abuse, it turns addicts into criminals to support their habit, and it is only consuming valuable space needed for those criminals that are violent and a threat to society.

It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and serious? Give me one good reason why can't we help those with drug problems instead of incarcerating them?

It's About Time - making it that is

Everyone has the exact same amount of time in the 24 hour day. We all have 1,440 minutes to use during the course of a single day. How we choose to use those minutes is where we each differ greatly. The optimal word here is "choose". Setting your priorities typically will dictate how those precious minutes will be divided up into segments called daily life. How one decides what those priorities are and how they will be set depends on the complicated act of balancing being a part of a family, earning a living, tasks and chores for the day, etc.

It seems that many folks express their concern for the lack of time to "get it all done." Obviously, the problem isn't the lack of time but the decisions one made about how to choose to allocate those finite 1,440 daily minutes.

I always hear the excuse, "I didn't have enough time", "I just had too much on my plate today", "I tried to take time, but…,” etc. For me, something just doesn't ring true with those attempted justifications. How could one not have enough time when the amount of time is always the same? How could you have too much on your plate, did you forget the plate is 1,440 minutes a day? The biggest so called excused that makes me crazy is not being able to take time. Where are these people taking time from? Is there an extra stock pile that I am not aware of?

The value of time is not something too difficult to understand. The supposition of how to utilize your time depends on your choices. What do you want to do with your time? If you choose to have a family then you have already determined that a significant amount of your 1,440 minutes are going to be devoted to them. If you choose to have a certain job/career then you have predetermined a minimum amount of those 1,440 minutes will be dedicated to earning a living. If you have chosen to on a hobby or exercise regimen, again you have concluded that it will consume some portion of those limited 1,440 minutes of each day.

The phrase, “couldn’t take time”, is one that needs to be removed from our English language. People do not take time for anything. People make time for everything.  People choose how to spend 1,440 minutes of every day of their life. Clearly, we have some exceptions to consider and that is when one is incapacitated or unable to make choices on their own. But let’s stick with the typical. One must make time not take time for every choice of every day.

Please don’t take time out of your day for me. I want you to make time for me. I want you to choose to spend time with me, to choose to make time to do something for me, to choose to make time to visit with me, etc. Forcing time isn’t a genuine demonstration of being a true friend. If you can’t make time, don’t take time. It ruins the purpose of time together.

It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and serious? Give me one good reason why can't we make time for those things that are important to us?