A male veteran friend was chatting with me the other day. He is a heavy duty, gun toating, racially challenged Republican and knows I'm all about Hillary. One of the questions he ask me was, "what do you think about women being allowed into combat?" As a liberal, feminist, and equal rights advocate I jumped at the chance to dive right into my answer and fire back my load of questions on the subject.
I was simple and direct. (who knew!) I told him that I had no problem with it as long as they have been trained properly, demonstrate the commitment required and can perform with equal results to their male counterparts. As his head was shaking with disappointment and his expression, of I knew she would approve of it, washed down his face I paused and then fired back.
I asked him what he thought, as a veteran of combat, about women fighting the enemies side by side with him. Part of his answer surprised me and the rest was a real mind blower. His immediate reply was that he didn't approve of women being in combat, but he quickly deflected a likely anticipated question from me, by saying that the women in combat are equally capable in the majority of the military tactics used. He when on to say that many are better in combat than men. I suspected a bit of attempted defensive maneuvering happening. Unfortunately, I don't remember what examples he sited were specifically.
The rest of his now very lengthy answer was that, "it is too difficult for a man to stay focused on the mission when there is a female in the fight with them." I hope my jaw didn't hit the driveway but it sure felt like it did. He went on to explain that when a man that has been deployed away from home for so long he has needs that are worsened by a woman's presence. I would have slapped him but he probably would have liked it! lol
I threw a few more questions about the impact of feminine hygiene and a woman's physical strength had on his males comerads. The one question that I personally felt to be critical was if he and his fellow male troops felt that they could count on and rely on a female in their combat unit. I was pleased to hear his reply, that yes he didn't have any insecurities regarding females in combat carrying their own and living the code.
To this day I have always felt that women should be provided the same opportunities as are provided men. Let us not forget equal pay for equal work. That law took way too long to pass but I digress. If anyone trying to do a job is unable to it then they don't get the job. That seems pretty simple and efficient to me, of course. To presume that women cannot and should not be in combat is simply ridiculous. Once again, males are still determining and controlling what women are "allowed" to do. I believe the original thought, and I believe to still be an issue, is that a woman role as a mother must be preserved to continue propagation. Therefore, we are not to place women in harms way. Ok now, give me a break, that notion should have been booted out decades ago. I believe that currently the argument remains on the question of a woman's capability to fight in combat. Well hell, if a woman can't do the job then don't give her the job. But to make a blanket assumption is a bit chauvinistic.
To find out, or more acurately to finally admit to thinking, that most male troops in combat can't do their job because they, "haven't seen a woman for so long causing them to be distracted...", was really a shocker. Then to hear my friend add one more stunning comment about how some of the women in combat sleep around with all the male troops, "making the rounds" as he put it, just tipped me over the edge. I think my tongue was bleeding I was biting it so hard. Really? That ended my conversation and I politely excused myself to return inside my house.
So the question remains: It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and seriously? Come on...give me any good reason why women shouldn't be allowed in combat with male counterparts?
Tuesday, July 30, 2013
Saturday, July 27, 2013
The Backseat - not the driver type
Sometimes, one has to take the backseat for a family member or friend. I don't mean it to be considered a bad place to be. They may have something more pressing or more important than you do at a specific time or for a specific period of time. I am always open minded to that idea as long as it is and remains respectful, necessary and temporary. If I am able to accomidate their need(s), then I'm willing, ready and able.
Now if the need arises for you to climb over into the backseat, (those of you from my generation probably did that literally), then one needs to consider the forementioned parameters. In addition, the frequency of these requests, the legitimacy of the requests and the purpose of these requests need to be included in the decision you make.
Your character will play a significant roll in your response to the request but even more so your character should give you insight to offer that you take the backseat before being asked to do so. However, if you offer to take the backseat then you cannot get upset when you find yourself sitting there for longer than you wanted. This is why it's important to not only make the gesture but to apply the same parameters I have listed as well as ensure both folks agree to them.
It's when that backseat has been customized for you, and it is expected that you permanently occupy, is when one should step back and reconsider the relationship. Now I do mean it to be considered a bad place to be. No one has the right to impose their will on you. You do not have the responsibility to accept the only option they have decided for you to have. Don't settle, don't sit in the back seat all the time, and do not accept anyone's attempt to control you. Respect yourself and perhaps even help that person be a better person by not playing their game. In an earlier blog I talk about taking the high road.
We all need to remember that the world doesn't revolve around us, but instead we make the world go around. If you are secure, confident and at peace it's easy to take the backseat whenever called upon. That is what you are supposed to do for those you love. It is ok to make that request of some else to do for you that for you but remember to follow your own rules and be sure that is respectful, necessary and temporary.
We shouldn't ever use or abuse the backseat. It must never be used as ammunition during a disagreement nor should it be used to punish someone by placing them there. Don't harbor negative feelings or thoughts. They don't do anything but waste your energy, consumes your time and is literally unhealthy. I feel another blog idea developing. Now if I could only remember if I have already covered this topic!
So the question remains: It is really simple don't you think, when you really think hard and seriously? Come on...give me any good reason why folks can't treat their friends and family with respect when it's necessary for them to take the back seat?
Now if the need arises for you to climb over into the backseat, (those of you from my generation probably did that literally), then one needs to consider the forementioned parameters. In addition, the frequency of these requests, the legitimacy of the requests and the purpose of these requests need to be included in the decision you make.
Your character will play a significant roll in your response to the request but even more so your character should give you insight to offer that you take the backseat before being asked to do so. However, if you offer to take the backseat then you cannot get upset when you find yourself sitting there for longer than you wanted. This is why it's important to not only make the gesture but to apply the same parameters I have listed as well as ensure both folks agree to them.
It's when that backseat has been customized for you, and it is expected that you permanently occupy, is when one should step back and reconsider the relationship. Now I do mean it to be considered a bad place to be. No one has the right to impose their will on you. You do not have the responsibility to accept the only option they have decided for you to have. Don't settle, don't sit in the back seat all the time, and do not accept anyone's attempt to control you. Respect yourself and perhaps even help that person be a better person by not playing their game. In an earlier blog I talk about taking the high road.
We all need to remember that the world doesn't revolve around us, but instead we make the world go around. If you are secure, confident and at peace it's easy to take the backseat whenever called upon. That is what you are supposed to do for those you love. It is ok to make that request of some else to do for you that for you but remember to follow your own rules and be sure that is respectful, necessary and temporary.
We shouldn't ever use or abuse the backseat. It must never be used as ammunition during a disagreement nor should it be used to punish someone by placing them there. Don't harbor negative feelings or thoughts. They don't do anything but waste your energy, consumes your time and is literally unhealthy. I feel another blog idea developing. Now if I could only remember if I have already covered this topic!
So the question remains: It is really simple don't you think, when you really think hard and seriously? Come on...give me any good reason why folks can't treat their friends and family with respect when it's necessary for them to take the back seat?
Thursday, July 25, 2013
Black and White - No, not the cookie
It's truly unfortunate, (look it up if you need to I chose that word as apposed to the media's term, tragic), that the death of a young man by a older man has happened, again. I purposely left out the obvious descriptions, of those involved, with the hope's that years down the road we won't remember the obvious but rather that what will be remembered is what most folks do not consider now a days. Hey, I am an optimist. Tragedies are exactly that "a lamented, dreadful or fatal event..." Was this event more tragic than the other estimated 146,357 deaths that occurred on that same day? Is every death tragic?
I am angered by the number of facts that were left out of the trial. Both the boy and the man had much more information to be shared about their pasts but were not allowed in court for various "legal" reasons.
I am angered by the number of facts that were left out of the media coverage. Not sure who made that call but it seemed that most of the major networks and news agencies failed to site all the facts. Perhaps they were happy with just those that made the event "tragic".
I am angered that the man didn't listen to the police instructions to stay in his car and that the boy was stereo typed by the man. But I am also angered because the boy attacked the man and was on top of him and beating him with mixed martial arts style blows to his head.
Stereotypes exist because they stem from folks who choose to broad stroke only a small portion of the observed, (sometimes even exaggerated or made up), layers of the "selected" group of people. When "judging someone", (I hate that by they way and YES that is another blog), few of those folks take time to consider all of the facts; the circumstances, their past history, their dreams, their talents, their passions, their potential, the missed opportunities, the prejudice, the hate, the pain, the anger. Those who judge are too busy wrapping themselves up in that self-fulfilling blanket of security.
The media no longer reports the news. They determine what is news and then report it in the way they want it to be seen. I think CNN and FOX are great examples of how the same story can be reported so completely different by two different NEWS agencies. What about truth in journalism? Yeah well that has kinda taken on a different meaning. This my friends is what I call greed. But I digress.
One story does not make a crisis. Some of my more extremely unsettling concerns (or crises if you prefer) are that adults still smoke themselves to death, children are still abused to death, elderly are still neglected to death. All of these "people" can be any color or ethnicity you want to assign them. After all that doesn't really matter in the long run. True, there are some ethnicities that have higher rates of certain causes of deaths per capita for various reasons. Adults, children and the elderly are all humans and deserve the respect that all humans should be given.
As I have always said, " I believe every emotion stems from either love or fear." Did this unfortunate death of the boy stem from love or fear? Perhaps you could ponder that when you care to make some time for it. You can also read my other blog on that very statement. So the question remains: It is really simple don't you think, when you really think hard and seriously. Come on, give me any good reason why this story has been given too much press when there are so many other stories that need to be told?
I am angered by the number of facts that were left out of the trial. Both the boy and the man had much more information to be shared about their pasts but were not allowed in court for various "legal" reasons.
I am angered by the number of facts that were left out of the media coverage. Not sure who made that call but it seemed that most of the major networks and news agencies failed to site all the facts. Perhaps they were happy with just those that made the event "tragic".
I am angered that the man didn't listen to the police instructions to stay in his car and that the boy was stereo typed by the man. But I am also angered because the boy attacked the man and was on top of him and beating him with mixed martial arts style blows to his head.
Stereotypes exist because they stem from folks who choose to broad stroke only a small portion of the observed, (sometimes even exaggerated or made up), layers of the "selected" group of people. When "judging someone", (I hate that by they way and YES that is another blog), few of those folks take time to consider all of the facts; the circumstances, their past history, their dreams, their talents, their passions, their potential, the missed opportunities, the prejudice, the hate, the pain, the anger. Those who judge are too busy wrapping themselves up in that self-fulfilling blanket of security.
The media no longer reports the news. They determine what is news and then report it in the way they want it to be seen. I think CNN and FOX are great examples of how the same story can be reported so completely different by two different NEWS agencies. What about truth in journalism? Yeah well that has kinda taken on a different meaning. This my friends is what I call greed. But I digress.
One story does not make a crisis. Some of my more extremely unsettling concerns (or crises if you prefer) are that adults still smoke themselves to death, children are still abused to death, elderly are still neglected to death. All of these "people" can be any color or ethnicity you want to assign them. After all that doesn't really matter in the long run. True, there are some ethnicities that have higher rates of certain causes of deaths per capita for various reasons. Adults, children and the elderly are all humans and deserve the respect that all humans should be given.
As I have always said, " I believe every emotion stems from either love or fear." Did this unfortunate death of the boy stem from love or fear? Perhaps you could ponder that when you care to make some time for it. You can also read my other blog on that very statement. So the question remains: It is really simple don't you think, when you really think hard and seriously. Come on, give me any good reason why this story has been given too much press when there are so many other stories that need to be told?
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
The High Road - No not off the road
Why is it so difficult for folks to take the high road? Don't most people have that moral compass to show them where the high road is? The simplistic things make me most crazy, like not letting one car merge into your lane as a courtesy, opening the door on the right when leaving a building (thus not making one wait for the enterance door to be freed for use after those leaving used it for exiting), letting the gal with three items behind you in line at the market to go in front of you, etc. You know the simple stuff. That simple stuff, if practiced by most, can make a difference, but once again I digress.
Now I know I have written about random acts of kindness, paying it forward, and making time. But this Blog idea has set me a blaze by the North Korean's threat to use it's, "maybe ready", nuclear bombs against the US. Obviously the US is taking this potentialy empty threat seriously. Why else would we start to strategically move our defenses into place? Oh what a great question!
Clearly there is no high road for either North Korea or the US to take. I understand that this threat is the ultimate threat and we need to protect our country...blah, blah, blah. Ok so knowing this young 26 year old leader of this nation is flexing his one and only muscle to show the world as well as his citizens that he isn't afraid to "literally" cause WWIII. I mean why not, that's what he was raised to portray, right? Doesn't that provide some transparency (oh how I love that word) of his real intentions? Sure he is sociopathic and doesn't care about his legacy, after all it won't exist if the world doesn't either. But I'm betting he would rather maintain his status quo for the lifestyle he has both with the possesion of power and of wealth. In a nut shell your basic sociopath little prick!
The South Korean's aren't too worried about the latest threat because they coninuosly live under this type of attempted fear mongering. Wait, did you just notice something? SK is trying to take the higher road? They aren't willing to give the little prick any validity with another empty threat. AKA the high road. Wow what a feeling. Good for SK and their refusal to be bullied. Hey, besides if they get bombed that pretty much wipes them out. Oh crap, but wait...they expect the Super Americans to protect them!
Perhaps they aren't taking the higher road at all, rather they are sticking their head in the ground. Damn, I though for once a high profile issue would be adverted by that higher road. I really hate politics, the pricks that play politics and the fact they always seem to get what they seek. And I'm not thrilled with the USA being the go to guys all of the time!
It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and serious? Come on give me any good reason why women shouldn't rule more countries!
Now I know I have written about random acts of kindness, paying it forward, and making time. But this Blog idea has set me a blaze by the North Korean's threat to use it's, "maybe ready", nuclear bombs against the US. Obviously the US is taking this potentialy empty threat seriously. Why else would we start to strategically move our defenses into place? Oh what a great question!
Clearly there is no high road for either North Korea or the US to take. I understand that this threat is the ultimate threat and we need to protect our country...blah, blah, blah. Ok so knowing this young 26 year old leader of this nation is flexing his one and only muscle to show the world as well as his citizens that he isn't afraid to "literally" cause WWIII. I mean why not, that's what he was raised to portray, right? Doesn't that provide some transparency (oh how I love that word) of his real intentions? Sure he is sociopathic and doesn't care about his legacy, after all it won't exist if the world doesn't either. But I'm betting he would rather maintain his status quo for the lifestyle he has both with the possesion of power and of wealth. In a nut shell your basic sociopath little prick!
The South Korean's aren't too worried about the latest threat because they coninuosly live under this type of attempted fear mongering. Wait, did you just notice something? SK is trying to take the higher road? They aren't willing to give the little prick any validity with another empty threat. AKA the high road. Wow what a feeling. Good for SK and their refusal to be bullied. Hey, besides if they get bombed that pretty much wipes them out. Oh crap, but wait...they expect the Super Americans to protect them!
Perhaps they aren't taking the higher road at all, rather they are sticking their head in the ground. Damn, I though for once a high profile issue would be adverted by that higher road. I really hate politics, the pricks that play politics and the fact they always seem to get what they seek. And I'm not thrilled with the USA being the go to guys all of the time!
It is really simple don't you think, when you really think, hard and serious? Come on give me any good reason why women shouldn't rule more countries!
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Spirits - Not Hocus-pocus
The great debate of soul, spirit, faith...it will never be resolved, nor should it be. Everyone on this planet has some thoughts about one or more of these words and what they mean to that individual varies so greatly. I find it absolutely facinating. A friend thinks there is more behind my fascination but that is an entirely different blog.
Just the other night we were sitting around the dinner table discussing the comparison of The Stories of Bible and The story of Frankenstein. It was a great dicsussion and I learned quite a bit about both stories. My friend was loving every moment. That type of discussion gets her going and I really enjoyed watching her enthusiasum for it! A very faithful and yet Apologetic believer. Interesting at the least!
So starting with the last word I typed, faith, lets talk about it. (Ok, I will talk and you read!) So many people have faith or claim to! That word alone is huge and there are multiple directions to take that word for interpritation and discussion. The faith I'm discussing at this time is a person's belief that there is a God that not only created them but predetermined the believers destiny. Ok, here we go...how can someone believe in that and yet find a need to pray for guidance, clarity, support, etc. if that persons destiny has been predetermined then how does prayer factor in? I'm sincere about that question. And this is where I get stuck.
I asked our group around the table about the fact Jesus died for our sins, right? Ok, so what happened to those folks who were born and died before Christ was born and died for the believe's sins? My flippant comment was that I was glad I was born AC. I digress. (as usual)
I'm not sure, but it is safe to say that most religions have their own definition of soul, spirit and faith. In fact, that is where I get really turned upside down. Sure, everyone has their own personal and organic definition that they then MUST reconcile with their religious beliefs. (one that someone decided to assemble like minded folks and then called it religion). Do not get me started there!!!
As most of you are aware my immediate family members were raised as Catholics. My father asked permission of his mother, (out of respect), if he could convert to Catholasism. With gracious permission he was granted his request. It then was determined all of the sibling in our family would be raised as Catholics and attend Catholc school. Since I'm 12 years behind my brother and sister that idea did not position me for anything other than a regular old public education. I'm unsure of the story of why I wasn't put through the delights of a a Catholic school but I'm sure finances factored in.
So let's get on to the next word, remember we are going backward, (don't ask why, just go along), spirit! What is spirit? Is it a feeling, a belief, a presence...I find this much easier to relate to. I do believe there are types and degrees of energy that surrounds us all and surges through us all. How it manifests itself in the hosting body is a great concept and is that the spirit I speak of? Can spirit be both positive and negative? Does one who possess the positive do so by choice or chance? The same for the negative, assuming that exists, does it choose the host or visa versa. Or, let me wrench it a bit more. Does everybody have a spirit and if so, does those who possess it know they do? Is that a learned element that over time ones, "ones gets to know it?"
For me, my spirit is reflected by my actions and my words. I'm not saying I'm close to perfect but I can confidently say that I am above average when it comes to my words and actions not only matching up properly but positively as well. Here's another wrench, Karma! Of all the words I believe in Kharma is huge, in fact I believe it to be the single most life influential words I have. Now, let me clarify that my love of Kharma isn't due to the fear of retribution. The old, "what goes around comes around." My passion for that word it the idea that my positive thoughts and actions will help to benefit folks who need it most. That he driver running late to work, the gal waiting too long in line at Starbuck's, the parent becomming angry with their child unwillingness to, "do as they are told."
I'm sure I have left you with doubt, confusion and perhaps so anger. I don't follow a religeous structure, nor do I see things with those hypnotizing glasses they hand out before mass on Sunday. I
do not harbor any judgement. I never will. Until you have been judged you'll never understand the
impact it carries with it.
Last and certainly not last is the word soul. Big word, does your definition measure up? Is ones soul
similar to spirt of entirely different? I liken my soul to the freedom it is given upon my physical death to continue onward to who knows where? Reincarnation? To replace one that a living being has never received aor lost it duringbacnear death experience? Oh, so many questions to get answers to, if the
exist that is.
Just the other night we were sitting around the dinner table discussing the comparison of The Stories of Bible and The story of Frankenstein. It was a great dicsussion and I learned quite a bit about both stories. My friend was loving every moment. That type of discussion gets her going and I really enjoyed watching her enthusiasum for it! A very faithful and yet Apologetic believer. Interesting at the least!
So starting with the last word I typed, faith, lets talk about it. (Ok, I will talk and you read!) So many people have faith or claim to! That word alone is huge and there are multiple directions to take that word for interpritation and discussion. The faith I'm discussing at this time is a person's belief that there is a God that not only created them but predetermined the believers destiny. Ok, here we go...how can someone believe in that and yet find a need to pray for guidance, clarity, support, etc. if that persons destiny has been predetermined then how does prayer factor in? I'm sincere about that question. And this is where I get stuck.
I asked our group around the table about the fact Jesus died for our sins, right? Ok, so what happened to those folks who were born and died before Christ was born and died for the believe's sins? My flippant comment was that I was glad I was born AC. I digress. (as usual)
I'm not sure, but it is safe to say that most religions have their own definition of soul, spirit and faith. In fact, that is where I get really turned upside down. Sure, everyone has their own personal and organic definition that they then MUST reconcile with their religious beliefs. (one that someone decided to assemble like minded folks and then called it religion). Do not get me started there!!!
As most of you are aware my immediate family members were raised as Catholics. My father asked permission of his mother, (out of respect), if he could convert to Catholasism. With gracious permission he was granted his request. It then was determined all of the sibling in our family would be raised as Catholics and attend Catholc school. Since I'm 12 years behind my brother and sister that idea did not position me for anything other than a regular old public education. I'm unsure of the story of why I wasn't put through the delights of a a Catholic school but I'm sure finances factored in.
So let's get on to the next word, remember we are going backward, (don't ask why, just go along), spirit! What is spirit? Is it a feeling, a belief, a presence...I find this much easier to relate to. I do believe there are types and degrees of energy that surrounds us all and surges through us all. How it manifests itself in the hosting body is a great concept and is that the spirit I speak of? Can spirit be both positive and negative? Does one who possess the positive do so by choice or chance? The same for the negative, assuming that exists, does it choose the host or visa versa. Or, let me wrench it a bit more. Does everybody have a spirit and if so, does those who possess it know they do? Is that a learned element that over time ones, "ones gets to know it?"
For me, my spirit is reflected by my actions and my words. I'm not saying I'm close to perfect but I can confidently say that I am above average when it comes to my words and actions not only matching up properly but positively as well. Here's another wrench, Karma! Of all the words I believe in Kharma is huge, in fact I believe it to be the single most life influential words I have. Now, let me clarify that my love of Kharma isn't due to the fear of retribution. The old, "what goes around comes around." My passion for that word it the idea that my positive thoughts and actions will help to benefit folks who need it most. That he driver running late to work, the gal waiting too long in line at Starbuck's, the parent becomming angry with their child unwillingness to, "do as they are told."
I'm sure I have left you with doubt, confusion and perhaps so anger. I don't follow a religeous structure, nor do I see things with those hypnotizing glasses they hand out before mass on Sunday. I
do not harbor any judgement. I never will. Until you have been judged you'll never understand the
impact it carries with it.
Last and certainly not last is the word soul. Big word, does your definition measure up? Is ones soul
similar to spirt of entirely different? I liken my soul to the freedom it is given upon my physical death to continue onward to who knows where? Reincarnation? To replace one that a living being has never received aor lost it duringbacnear death experience? Oh, so many questions to get answers to, if the
exist that is.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
